Thursday, September 20, 2012

The Bible According to Kids (When you need to laugh!)

I found this posted by one of my friends on Facebook.
This you keep when you need a really good laugh!

*The Bible according to kids*

The following statements about the Bible were written by children and have not been retouched or corrected (i.e. bad spelling has been left in.)

  • The greatest miracle in the Bible is when Joshua told his son to stand still and he obeyed him.
  • David was a Hebrew king skilled at playing the liar.  He fought with the Finkelsteins, a race of people who lived in Biblical times. 
  • Solomon, one of David’s sons, had 300 wives and 700 porcupines.
  • St. John, the blacksmith, dumped water on his head. 
  •   He also explained that “Man does not live by sweat alone”. 
  • It was a miracle when Jesus rose from the dead and managed to get the tombstone off the entrance.
  • St. Paul cavorted to Christianity. He preached the holy acrimony, which is another name for marriage. 

  • A Christian should have only one spouse.  This is called monotony.

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